I don't know whether or not you got the chance to read the other, but allow me to say this.

I'm sorry for jumping to conclusions. I don't want you to think I'm mad at you, because honestly, I thought you were mad with me. Yeah, I did think you were ignoring or avoiding me, but now I feel extremely stupid. I'm sorry. 

                                                                                                   -Surreal 

this sucks. 

I've finally got my computer back (appearantly something was wrong with the network card,) but I'm still relatively sick. It's kind of weird to go back to using a computer again, I'd just finally adjusted to dealing with homework without one. My throat keeps giving out on me and it seriously isn't fun. 

Everything's been a bit on the random side lately. 

Suddenly, I'm talking to people who I once believed would kill me with the opportunity presented, even telling things of my personal life. I keep catching tidbits of conversation that I'm generally better off not knowing (ie, it's too cold when I can't feel my balls?) as well as listening to rap and deathmetal (don't ask, I don't know either.) Things are randomly breaking. It's un-naturally cold, because the windshield was froze over this morning. Certain actions are occuring at weird times, and people are getting away with odd things. I really don't get it, but I don't think I'm supposed to. 

Oh well, it's all fun and games, right? 

Shortcut/Launching
RocketDock - Dock/application launcher
ÜberIcon -Icon effects and a plugin for RocketDock
Launchy - Open source keystroke launcher

GUI Enhancements
Rainmeter - Customizable performance meter, use with the HUD.Vision skin
ViStart - Start menu enhancement
ViOrb - Replaces your start button with Vista's start orb
WinFlip - Flip 3D' function for Windows XP
HyperDesk - Windows GUI skinner
AlienGUIse - Windows GUI skinner by AlienWare
MS Powertoys

Browsers
Firefox
Flock - Based off Firefox
Opera - Web browser, email client, torrent support
Chrome - Google's creation
Safari - Apple's creation
Maxthon - Started from IE
SpaceTime - The web in 3D
Pogo - AT&T's work in progress
List of web browsers

Utilities
7-zip - Free compression
CCleaner - Computer decrapifier (Crap Cleaner)
Recuva - File recovery
Defraggler - File defragmentation tool
GlaryUtilities - All-in-one computer tool

Graphics
IcoFX - The Free Icon Editor
The GIMP - The GNU Image Manipulation Program
Inkscape - Open-source vector graphics editor
Paint.Net - Free image and photo editing software
Picasa - Photo organizer and editor

Text Editors
Notepad++ - Notepad replacement, but so much more
AbiWord - Free word processing program

Office
OpenOffice - Open-source office suite

Chat/IM
Pidgin - Multi-protocol instant messaging client
Miranda - Open-source multi-protocol instant messenger client

Media Players
VLC
Winamp - Free and skin-able
Miro - Free and open-source
Kantaris - Can play almost anything you throw at it

Disc Utilities
InfraRecorder - Free CD/DVD burning

Well, I've reached the point where either something happens and absolutely everything changes, or nothing happens and I'm stuck in gray matter. I realized that my previous post was extremely difficult to read if you know certain aspects of my life, and so I decided to delete it. But you know, they say it's always worse before it gets better, so I've decided that this is where it gets better if it kills me. It's an all or nothing deal and I want it all, so I'm taking all I can get.
People ask if they can help; before now, I've usually said, "No, don't worry about it" or the default of mankind, "I'm fine." Now my answer is yes. Either give me everything or don't give me anything at all, I don't want a half-done effort. Make it worth my while or get the heck outta Dodge. I want something to change, and I kept waiting for it to just pop up, but life doesn't work like that. Sometimes you have to take initiative.
I'm starting to figure out the system of people I know: friends, family (not necessarily by blood), enemies, and everyone else. It really helps knowing who my friends are. I know who I can count on when I think there's nothing left for me here, like I did last night. Obviously, if they're there, then I'll be there with them, and that's reciprocated.


(To people who will likely never read this and one that will)
On a totally different note (or maybe not):
Feel special if you're one of the few to here me laugh today without it sounding bitter. Today was another one of those days, which seriously made me change my outlook on my life, because a day's as good as you make it. Thanks for being there. Love

- Surreal

Yes, I know it's been established multiple times that the term "stupid people" is incredibly redundant, but sometimes we need proof.
Here's one: Totally didn't think about the fact that, not only does my friend's mom have a MySpace, but she also has me added. So that friend's mom saw a rather.... ahem, provocative picture that was a completely innocent picture snapped at just the wrong moment to be awkward. So, I think it might have made my friend mad at me, but hey, we all screw up. It isn't like he hasn't ever ticked me off before. So it balances out. But really people, think before you act, because sometimes we can do something that has permanent effects. So we all screw up, it makes us human.